Sometimes I wonder what I was brought into this world for. A long time ago I used to say I wanted to be an attorney because I like to fight. Not physically, but in a situation. But now I’m starting to question the Karma I’ve gotten from that quote. I’ve been fighting a certain matter for almost 3 years now and it’s taken a toll on me. I honestly don’t know if I have any more fight left in me.
It such a personal matter that I don’t write about it but damn I would love to so I could get some writer’s therapy from it.
I do write about it in my journal which has left me with tons of depressing physical notebook memories that I don’t like to refer back to.
This matter has gotten 100 times worse in a matter of one day and it was something I expected to happen a long time ago. And the sad thing is, no one believed me. Everyone thought I was nuts or just rebelling against the subject.
This is the reason why I called my blog ‘Beautiful Mayhem’. And I can’t even publicly write about it.